For myself actually haha,

So, today dah keluar result for Medicine posting which was my last posting for year 3. And i got highest grade within the class for the posting! Which is B+ (there are other 3 jugak yg dpt grade sama, well kita berempat highest xD)

Alhamdulillah. Well, never thought that Allah gave me this when i asked for only a little. My friends said that im definitely in love with medical posting. Hm, i guess i did haha. My least-fav-need-to-repair-study-more-asap will be obstetrics and gynaecology. Maybe because i dont really understand the management though. Need to have a good sensei for this understanding. InsyaAllah, i'll improve myself.

Before i would like to proceed further, im very sorry for you guys if youguys ever read my previous post because of the amount of typos i made. I just realized it though tapi malas nak betulkan. Sorry eh.

Actually itu je news nya. So this August i'll be starting my year 4 of medical school. How time flies. Effortlessly. I remember those days when i was freaking out for professional exam 1. And now in less than 2 years i'll be siting for final professional exam. This is insane people.

Im getting old, yes. Haha.

Its okay farahin. Do what you always do! Praaay a lot, have faith, believe, hold your heart tightly and those hardwork of yours that no one else can handle except you, yourself. People say that i have insane energy of working. Is it? Hahaha.

So how are you guys? Alhamdulillah, im happier :)

Year 3 medical school was an awesome experiences. The pains and the loves that ive received. It was wonderful.


Im healing. Yes, some wound of mine did healed. Im blessed with beautiful friends surrounded me. I dont usually forget things quickly (which is the reason why im in medical school :')) haha). But i forgive them. I make mistakes. Well, they too.

Ive been into few relationships with a whole different character each. But few of them really affected me (masih budak2 masa tu). There's one that really did. It eventually changed me. Towards the better.

I can still feel the pain whenever the memories came across my mind. I dont know why it did. Well like people always said, thats just how love is. Unpredictable.

Ive met lot of people. But none of them felt like the person made me feel. I always question, why do people turn back when they decide to walk forward and away? Because thats just what I experienced currently. Its me who is the one that turn back. I went back to the years that everyone already left.

And not long from today, Allah did sent me an answer from a friend of mine. Im affected to her replies. She said that " maybe because that person makes you feel like home". Maybe the person did.

From time to time, i seek advices for a peace of heart. In seeking a relieve. Im learning of letting go. Of slowly to stay in track and keep moving forward. I learned to pray and hold on to my faith for things that i unable to control. Towards the things that are Allah's secret. I learned to put my highest trust to Allah. I learned to be calm.

Its painful to think about relationships and so i decided to not thinking about it. Ive met lots of new people. Which are veryy nice.

Not long ago, ive tried to open my heart back and tried for accepting 'new' person in my life. Ive tried. It doesnt work very well, it is because im the one who decided to stop from it going into further serious action. Im not sure. Its just doesnt feel right. I dont know.

Maybe i didnt heal completely. Maybe im not yet ready. For now, im still not ready for accepting. Until when, i still cant answer that.

But im reaally happy of seeing other poeple building up relationships. And especially for dr Beni which is just married. So proud :'))

So yeah, im focusing in building up my career. Im sure, the one is waiting me out there. Seeing me sad might break his heart (cewah). I promise to be happy and be grateful all the time. One day, which is the day that i met the one. I wanted him to know that i have been waiting for him. Ive been praying to Allah that your presence is the starting where my wound will be completely mend. Im broken into pieces before and thank you for completing the piece. Thank you to act as a support due to my fragility.

I save this writing here for a while and when i meet him, i promise to show this to him!! Hehe :)



Akhir kata, assalamualaikum.